people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Randomize