I hope mine doesn't look like that
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Randomize
