My girlfriend figured out who you are.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
You are the jesus of drinking
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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