I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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