i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
