Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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