Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
