we have officially lost it.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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