Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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