I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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