yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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