no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
