how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
is wine microwaveable?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
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