When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
