none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
