I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
50% drunk capacity currently
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
