I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
