so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
