youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
