She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
i now understand why vodka
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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