You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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