I never want to see another naked old woman again.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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