If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
