the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
