sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
