What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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