it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.