so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
