bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
