Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
