Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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