oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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