I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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