I didn't shave. On purpose
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
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