just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Randomize
