pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
