I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
