i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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