He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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