Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize