your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
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I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize