Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize