I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........