ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
