Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Fuck appropriateness.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
