she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
