Are we in a gay sports bar?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
