you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize