I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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