i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
