this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
